Why doesn’t insomnia ever occur when I don’t have to be up early in the morning? If this was the weekend, it would be fun. Stay up late watching movies, making love, reading a book. But unfortunately, I have to be up earlier than usual tomorrow, so it just makes it a shitty deal.

And the longer I’m awake, the more frustrated I get, and the more I worry about how shitty I will feel tomorrow, and the harder it becomes to sleep.

It’s the worst feeling. And I’m sure everyone out there knows it well. I feel so tired that I can barely walk three feet. However, closing my eyes does nothing.

I start a “new” job in the morning. That’s probably what’s keeping me awake. However, I don’t feel nervous or excited at all. I applied for a position at the Starbucks I used to work at, had an interview half an hour later, and had the job later that day.

Yay! I have a job…and some cash flow.

Unfortunately, I left that Starbucks for a reason, I didn’t overly like working there. I won’t be a manager though, just a bottom rung employee with no responsibility. Just the way I wanted it.

It’s back to the 4am wake up calls and endless lineups of grumpy caffein addicts.

No more shitty phone company.

Speaking of which, they called, and are willing to pay me for four hours of work, and give me the total amount of my signing bonus (for signing the collective agreement) if I bring them a letter of resignation. It sounded fishy. It’s not like them to hand out money like that when they don’t have to, or if there isn’t something they’re hiding. Perhaps if I don’t except that, they’d have to give me more.

Something like that…

But I just don’t give a shit! All I want is to walk away and make a clean cut and never go back.

Maybe I can’t sleep because I’m so *!*@#$$&% hungry.

OK. Now what? tv? A book?

Ugh