Nurse Sean (dot) com

It’s 9:30 in the morning and I panicked! I haven’t posted in more than
a month, and well, that’s just unacceptable. I have been quite
extensively distracted though…

Yesterday I did something stupid–yet amazing. I bought one of
the new G4 iBooks. SWEET! I am actually going to have a
laptop to use for school! I’m in heaven. I haven’t used a
mac in a few years. My last one was an old iMac with OS 8.6, so
it’s been a bit of work orienting myself. I’m SO happy with
everything. There were a heck of a lot of frustrating moments last
night when trying to transfer iTunes music over (all 3000 songs).
Most of the “easy ways” turned out to not work, and the hard way turned
out to be even harder than expected.

But, it’s done!

I’m really not ready for school. This year is maternity,
pediatrics and community nursing. The main problem is that I’m
really not interested in any of these topics. Oddly enough, the
only course I find interesting is the one class I’m taking that
involves the history, philosophy, politics etc. of nursing. I’m
craving a bit of theory.

I’m still on strike. It’s been about five weeks since we were
locked out. Every day on the picket line becomes increasingly
tedious. I’m getting by though, and really, who can complain
about getting paid to do nothing but stand around with a sign.

I haven’t been picketing this week though. I took the week off to
have my wisdom teeth done–something I’ve been putting off for more than
ten years. It finally came to a point in which I just couldn’t
put it off any longer. I got a big cavity in one of the teeth,
and following a few days of pain–all four wisdom teeth were
removed. There’s definitely been some pain, but all in all,
definitely not as bad as I expected.

The married life is good. I’ve been living with R. for more than a
month now. Lots of growing pains and adjustments. I’ve
realized just how much of a solitary creature I am. But, I’m sure
all will settle down into bliss soon. R. was away the other day,
and I felt lonely, I desperately missed him, and I couldn’t sleep
without him next to me. All feelings I’ve never felt before
(well, not in regards to just one night without him).

I have several Spira projects crashing down on me. They will all
coincide with the piling up of school assignments. So, I’m off to
start working on some of those.

So, I’m on strike.

After spending all that time writing that last post, I realized that I meant to list several reasons as to why my life is chaotic, and I ignored all but one of them. I didn’t intend to write so much on the one subject.

Last Thursday, workers at the telephone company I work for (Telus) set up picket lines and declared themselves locked out. It’s a long and boring story, but Telus says we’re on strike, the union says we’re locked out.

Managment at Telus has slowly and increasingly treated us like pieces of garbage. Two years ago, Telus was an amazing company to work for, but now, it is a hell hole. An absolutely sickening company. I won’t go into examples because I don’t have a thousand hours, but just take my word for it.

The union is declaring that they want stronger protection for our jobs, no out sourcing, wage equity, yadda yadda yadda.

What it comes down to me is simply that Telus is mean to us, and I now have the chance to protest them. I am protesting against them in general, not just for detailed contracting issues. I am standing up against them because I don’t believe in the way they run their company.

What makes me sad are the people that are crossing picket lines. We are fighting for a better, more respectful work environment, and all they can think of is “Telus is offering me lots of money to cross the line–so I’m going to.”

I trust to easily.

During a union rally, Telus decided to parade about 200 managers and workers who crossed the line in front of us. They chanted about how much they love Telus, they shouted slurs at us, they laughed at us. The stand off became quite intense and felt close to errupting in violence.

And amongst these people standing against us were those I called friends, peers, and team members. They were people I trusted. They have aligned themselves against me for a few dollars. They couldn’t care less if what they think they are doing is right or wrong–they’re just excited about being financially rewarded for switching sides.

Ironically, many of the people I saw chanting about how much they love Telus, were those that complained the most about their jobs and managers.

It didn’t make me mad, it just saddened me…that the human spirit can be so easily influenced by money–by simple bribes. But that’s life.

I could go on forever. I don’t think I could even justly describe my feelings on the matter. I’m not a good enough poet or writer.

Another work place post…

Actually, my posts have been excessively sparse lately. I have been spending most of my time at R’s house these days, and I don’t want to post from there. Reason being, I want to go through and set all posts about R. as private before there’s any chance that he can see them.

We will be sharing a computer in a few days, so it will be possible for him to see what I’m writing. So, obviously, I don’t want him seeing anything that he wasn’t meant to see.

I’ve been playing house wife the last couple days. Sending R off to work with a kiss, and welcoming him home with a hug. Ironing his clothes and setting them out for him. Grocery shopping–making him dinner. Watching Days of Our Lives.

Seriously, I think I was meant for this life! I love taking care of my man!

How 1950s is that! (If your a women).

******

Work is a very strange atmosphere lately. We will be going on strike on Friday, so there’s very much a “calm before the storm” happening.

I feel like a war is about to start, and I am one of the soldiers. Fortunately it’s a war of ideologies–non violent. At least, not yet. Strikes do have the tendency to get vicious, but let’s hope it never gets to that!

The tension is certainly thick. But, for now, business as usual.

*******

Moving begins in the next few days–I hate it!

Add to that, I’m house sitting at my parent’s for two week.

An organizational nightmare!

So, I’m still feeling a bit emotionally confused from yesterday.
I wrote a protected post about someone. Basically, a man whom I
have had feelings for for years showed up on my doorstep (just to say
hello…as a friend) but it magically brought back floods of
emotions. If you want to read it, just let me know, I’d add you
to the protected list. It really isn’t exciting enough
though…clips from long ago posts.

Anyway, today, I sit at home, still a bit sick with a sinus infectino
– the only remnant of my cold. I should be at work, but I’m
hiding. There’s BIG #$*%&$ going down there this week.
I may be on strike in a few days. We get money to picket, but I’m
going broke…and fast! I have financial commitments that need to
be met. So, I’m a little scared about that. Although, the
idea of a strike is a little exciting. I’ve never been involved
in one before, and I think it would be an interesting experience.
Plus, I hate the company I work for, and don’t really want to ever go
back there…so that side of it would be nice.

Damn the man!!!

And before you think “If you hate your job…get a new one!” That
is, in fact, a primary goal for the next few weeks. I hate the
whole process though. Interviews, applications, resumes,
refrences…etc. etc. etc. Makes me cringe at the thought.

I do have plans to head to the mall and pick up a couple items of
clothing. That will be nice. I could use some stuff.
But I’m still debating if I can spare the $100 or so in spite of the
uncertainties at work.

Tonight I have a ritual. It’s been awhile since I’ve been to a
ritual with my pagan “peeps.” I’m looking forward to it.
Two students are completing their final “drawing down” assignment, and
will soon graduate to full status within our circle. Excitement
abounds!

Yesterday, I sent out an introduction to my new students entering into
their first year on May 1st. I love teaching, and I always look
forward to this time of year when new students are eager and ready to
learn. Sadly, the majority drop out after a few weeks when they
realize that learning is work….not just fun.

Oh…but I refuse to let pessimism creep in already.

I’m going to see R. tonight. I’m pretty happy about that.
It has been about a week since I saw him last, and I truly miss
him. Sometimes it feels like he has no interest in seeing me more
than once a week. The problem is that I’m a clingy kind of guy,
and he isn’t. Now, I’ve learned my lesson in the past when a
clingy guy acts clingy around a non-clingy guy…it just doesn’t
work. So, I’m hanging back, just letting him decide when we get
together. Unfortunately, that leads to resentment and frustration
on my side. Two things that are also not so good…

Add to that, my feelings for G. that have recently bubbled to the surface, and you have one frustrated man!

Fortunately, I know that as soon as R. Hugs me, and says he missed me,
I will melt into his arms, and know that all is right in the world.

Pyrsos